What Should I Do when Other Christians Tell me Not to Pray for Them?

When other believers reject me so completely that they order me not to pray for them, this doesn't change what God tells me to do for them. I should continue doing good to them, as the opportunity presents itself. Galatians 6:7-10. This includes praying for them.

There have been times in my life—this has happened more than once—that some of my fellow believers in Christ have become so angry with me that they have rejected me, and, in rejecting me, have ordered me to stop praying for them.  They don’t want to acknowledge me as a brother—or even as human—at all, and don’t want me ever even to think about them.  They never really explain why they don’t want me to pray for them. Is it that they are afraid I will pray judgment upon them or disaster into their lives, and God will hear and grant my request?  Is it that they don’t want their reputation with God soiled by association with me?  Or do they think that God will hear my prayers for blessings in their lives, but hear them as curses because I’m so evil?  I am never told this. 

But, as I will cover in a few later installments, all possible reasons for not wanting my prayers really deny the justice and goodness of God.  The demand that I should not pray in itself must assert that they fear God will in some way do them harm, even though they are believers in Christ and living righteously, simply because a deplorably wicked man is praying about them. 

But God is simply not that way.  He is just and good.  He wants to do them good.  He will not allow my prayers to unjustly harm them.

And I have many commands to continue to do good to them, to favor them as fellow believers, and, yes, to pray for them.  But, in this installment, I’ll briefly discuss only a single passage that says I should do them good and favor them:

Don’t be deceived. God is not mocked, for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.  For he who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption. But he who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.  Let’s not be weary in doing good, for we will reap in due season, if we don’t give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let’s do what is good toward all men, and especially toward those who are of the household of the faith.  

Galatians 6:7-10 (WEB)

First, I notice the reason behind Paul’s instruction to do good to others:  God is not mocked.  God knows when I have done what is good, following the Holy Spirit within me, from the heart.  He also knows when I have done wrong—even though it may look good to others—following the promptings of the old me, my corrupt flesh.  He knows, and rewards accordingly, in his own time.

Next is Paul’s encouragement to me when I am (as usual!) tired and discouraged:  don’t become so weary of doing good that I give up on it and go back to serving myself.  And let me tell you—having other believers walk away from me because they think I’m no longer human and am so wicked that God may punish them for my prayers on their behalf is very discouraging.  But Paul is telling me that, even when this happens, I shouldn’t give up.  I should keep on doing good. I should keep on doing good even when their rejection of me is the result of a sin, some past lapse from doing good on my part.  God has forgiven my sins, and I am therefore not so wicked that I am unsalvageable and should just give up and do whatever feels good for the brief remainder of my short life.  Keep on doing good.  Why?  “We will reap in due season, if we don’t give up.”  

Finally, I notice the people to whom I am to keep on doing good, and when I am supposed to do it:   I am to do good whenever the opportunity to do good presents itself.  That means, among other things, that when the Spirit shows me an opportunity to do good, I should follow the Spirit where He is leading right now.  I should not say that it’s a bad time for it now, I’ll do it later when it’s more convenient to me.  (By then, the opportunity will be gone). 

And who is to receive the good that I do?  I am to do good to everyone, but “especially” to those who are of the household of faith.  I am not supposed to pick and choose from among the opportunities the Holy Spirit leads me to, saying some people are more worthy of His goodness but others are less worthy or unworthy.  God knows what He is doing, and I usually don’t!

While I should do good to everyone, as God gives me opportunity, I am to go out of my way to seek opportunities to do good to other believers—those “of the household of the faith.”  We are brothers and sisters, members of one household, members of one body.  This includes even fellow Christians who have rejected me and no longer think of me as a brother.  I am to go out of my way to seek opportunities to do them good, as well, within the limits they have set on their ability to receive good things from me. 

I can always pray for them.

So I will!

Email me: Ian Johnson

NEXT: Parts of doing good:  love, affection, honor, prayer, hospitality, caring for each other’s needs, preferring each other